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When people are going through the emotional trauma of separation and divorce, they turn to Canada's best-selling guide to family law, Surviving Your Divorce . In it, family law expert Michael G. Cochrane, LL.B., answers questions such as: What are my rights? What will happen to the children? How much does divorce cost? Surviving Your Divorce is a non-technical book that explains the legal options available to married, common-law, and same-sex couples going through separation or divorce. This popular guide: covers child custody, division of property, support, domestic violence, the rights of common-law couples, and much more; provides tips and strategies to help you negotiate separation and divorce with your lawyer, potentially saving a lot of time and money; includes real-life stories that illustrate the application of family law; includes samples of key legal and financial documents, a comprehensive resource section, and a glossary of legal terms. Be prepared for the process of divorcing. You can help your lawyer by knowing what questions to ask and what steps are involved. Considering self-representation? An entirely new chapter shows you how to build a framework for your case the same way lawyers do, with 50 tips on how to handle court appearances and more. This readable, informative book is packed with all the information necessary to make informed decisions about marriage and divorce agreements. Cochrane has taken pains to describe just about every legal pitfall and divorce experience imaginable . (Calgary Herald). This book is not intended to convince you to go it alone, without a lawyer. It's designed, rather, to help you know what to expect...This is a book full of common-sense advice delivered in plain talk . ( The Gazette (Montreal) ). This title features: money- and anxiety-saving strategies; how to help your lawyer help you; what not to do when going through divorce; secrets, tactics, and strategies used by lawyers; and, how to represent yourself in court.
Acknowledgements x Author's Note xi Introduction to the 5th Edition 1 Chapter : Taking A Look at Ourselves: Th e Emotional Stages of Marriage Breakdown 11 Some Observations on Marriage 13 Emotional Stages 14 Marriage Counselling: Getting Help to Cope 19 Why Did Th is Happen? The Causes of Divorce 20 Transition People: Cause or Casualty 21 To Sum Up 22 Chapter 2: Taking A Look At Lawyers: Take Charge of the Relationship 23 Family Law Lawyers: A Special Breed 24 Finding A Lawyer 24 The Ideal Family Law Lawyer 25 The Rights Movements 26 Confl icts of Interest 27 Family Law and Legal Aid 27 The Retainer (or What Everyone Else Calls a Contract) 28 Confidentiality 30 The First Interview with Your Lawyer 31 If You are Dissatisfied with Your Lawyer 32 Firing Your Lawyer 35 What to Do When You Are Unhappy about Your Lawyer's Bill 37 To Sum Up 38 Chapter 3: Taking a Look at the Process: Understanding Family Law and the Legal System 40 The Legal System 42 Onus of Proof 43 Family Law and the Courts 43 The Rules of Court 47 To Sum Up 56 Chapter 4: Getting a Divorce: Dissolving the Marriage Vows 58 Grounds for Divorce 59 Reconciliation (Hey, Sometimes It Happens) 63 Th e Procedure for a Divorce 64 Uncontested Divorces 66 Urgently Needed Divorce 66 Joint Application for Divorce 67 Contested Divorces 67 Bars to Divorce 68 Marriages of Convenience 69 Legal Fees for Divorce 70 To Sum Up 71 Chapter 5: Dividing Th e Family's Property: Get Your Fair Share from the Marriage Partnership 73 Time Limitations: Waiting Can Cost you Your Rights 75 What Is Property ? 75 What Is Debt? 76 Financial Statements 77 Value of Assets and Liabilities 78 How Is Value Determined? 79 What Is not Divided? Exempt Property 81 Date of Valuation 83 Unequal Division of Property Values 83 Th e Matrimonial Home 84 Pensions 85 Canada Pension Plan (CPP) 88 Paying an Amount to Resolve Property 89 Some Tax Considerations 89 To Sum Up 92 Chapter 6: Obligations to the Children of a Divorce: Every Parent's Top Priority 94 Custody and Access: Understanding Terminology 95 Who Is a Child? 98 How Is Custody Determined? 100 Help from Professionals When Determining Custody 105 Hotspots 106 Strategic Considerations 116 Paternity Agreements 122 What Will We Tell the Children? 122 A Warning 130 To Sum Up 130 Chapter 7: Support: Financial Assistance aft er Separation 133 Child Support 135 Who Is a Parent? 139 Who Is a Child? 140 Spousal Support 149 Parental Support 158 To Sum Up 159 Chapter 8: Common-Law Spouses Have Rights too: (Just Not the Same as Married Couples) 162 The Meaning of Common Law 162 Children in Common-Law Relationships 164 Spousal Support 164 Property Division for Common-Law Couples 166 Federal Legislation 171 Cohabitation Agreements 171 Obtain Legal Advice 171 To Sum Up 172 Chapter 9: Settling Your Diff erences: Avoiding the Courtroom 174 1. Off ers to Settle 176 2. Minutes of Settlement 178 3. Orders on Consent 179 4. Separation Agreements 179 5. Memorandum of Understanding 186 To Sum Up 187 Chapter 10: Not Settling Your Diff erences: Going to Court 188 Th e Courtroom 190 Th e Paper Chase 192 Th e Trial Itself 192 Appeals 199 Conclusion 200 Chapter 11: Alternatives to Court: Mediation, Arbitration and Collaborative Family Law 202 Mediation 203 Arbitration 210 Mediation/Arbitration 210 Religious Arbitration 211 Collaborative Family Law 212 Strategic Considerations for Alternatives to the Court 213 To Sum Up 214 Chapter 12: Enforcing Family Law Orders: Making an Order Stick 216 Custody Enforcement 217 The Hague Convention on Civil Aspects of International Child Abduction 219 Tips on Dealing with Abductions 220 Canada Customs and Travelling Outside Canada 221 Access Enforcement 223 Support Enforcement 225 The Support Enforcement Offices 227 Property Enforcement 229 Personal Restraining Orders 231 Contempt 232 To Sum Up 233 Chapter 13: Grandparents and Other Interested Persons 234 Grandparents-A Special Status 235 Other Persons 242 To Sum Up 243 Chapter 14: Domestic Violence: A Problem that Just Won't Go Away 244 Violence: Th e Myths 246 Why Are Women Assaulted? 247 Why Do Men do It? 248 What Can be Done? 249 Strategic Considerations and Domestic Violence 252 To Sum Up 255 Chapter 15: Marriage Contracts and Cohabitation Agreements: Managing Your Relationship-Contractually 257 Marriage Contracts 258 Cohabitation Agreements 261 Setting Aside Domestic Contracts 263 To Sum Up 265 Chapter 16: Family Law and Your Will 267 Making a Will 267 Divorce and Your Will 270 First Meeting with the Divorce Lawyer 271 To Sum Up 272 Chapter 17: Self-Representation: How to Represent Yourself 274 Introduction 274 A 10-Step Legal Framework for Your Case 275 50 Tips for Your Day in Court 288 Dealing with Lawyers 291 Dealing with Court Staff 292 Dealing with the Judge 292 Getting Help from Lawyers: Th e Limited Retainer 292 Legal Research 293 Internet Resources 295 How to Complain 298 To Sum Up 299 Appendix A: Some Important Paperwork 300 Th e Retainer Form 300 A Separation Agreement 302 Th e Family Law Client History Form 319 Appendix B (To be Attached to a Full Separation Agreement): The Parenting Plan 321 Appendix C: Table of Common-Law Rights and Responsibilities 330 Appendix D: Canadian Child Support Guidelines 332 A Glossary of Family Law Terms 338 Index 345
Michael Cochrane, LL.B., has been practicing law in Ontario for over 30 years. He is the author of numerous books on family law, including Do We Need a Marriage Contract? and Do We Need a Cohabitation Agreement? He has hosted Strictly Legal, a legal affairs program on BNN, and has been a guest legal expert on programs such as Canada A.M., Counterspin, and As It Happens. For his speaking schedule and further information, visit www.michaelcochrane.ca.

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